January 2010
Cass & i on bbm ytd
J : Cass you know i'm okay now because i have him. I'm going crazy somehow but i'm still okay. But the moment i dont i think i will just go crazy because there's a lot i believe in.
C : I know but you'll have me sigh
J : I know but i can't marry you can i? hahaha
C : We'll be okay in the end. I give up on marriage, cause its not iain.
J : I'm an eternal optimist of love and marriage but...
C: I believe in love still
J : SIGH
1032hrs i gave and gave th best of me, couldnt...
i honestly thought i would have stayed home last night t get some full recovery from th night before. but instead, i had a mini family reunion at Shanhai Dolly,isaac stph andy tim too actually, downed to many and ended up by th side of a toilet bowl. still, i pushed th limit and headed down t Zouk/Phuture fo another round with th other 2 family boys,Brotha & Cheney which accumalated t Qian,...
2202hrs ShangHai Dolly
downg my first glass, looks like i wouldnt be driving tonight.
one more round, one more round.
drink up now, forget all about it.
i got you.
Go ahead and say goodbye, I’ll be alright
Go ahead and make me cry, I’ll be alright
And when you need a place to run to
For better, for worse, I got you, I got you
Ain’t falling apart or bitter, let’s be bigger than that
And remember the cooling outdoor when you’re all alone
We’ll go on surviving, no drama, no need for a show
Just wanna say, I got you
0227hrs this is how bored i am at Zouk that i am...
andy: eh you let down hair nicer
caxs: ay, i damn hot jz now
andy: you always hot what
caxs: ha ha ha *roll eyes*
2239hrs waitg fo Driver Tan. haa.
i really am tired and sleepy. and i feel like stuffing wrist-slashing music down my ears on repeat and get some early rest tonight but instead im in Chloe perfume and pickn heels waitg fo Andy t come pick Brotha and me up t hit th clubs. so by th time im back, id either be drained from all th dancing or tipsy from all th “if youre my friend you’ll drink”.
this is how close i am...
this made jaded fade
glen: "X" is here.
caxs: sick!!
glen: hahah! fatty bombom
caxs: ??Later "X" put disease in your house. "X" so dirty! glen dont be friend with "X"!
glen: Hahahahahha!!!!
caxs: really! dont be friends with "X"
would you save my soul tonight
1148hrs cheney replies t my personal message on...
cheney: you have. you jz left it to th wrong person.
caxs: Uhhuh so I don’t have la. Idiot cz I gave someone else alr
cheney: but he threw it away. so got like respawn you know? like you play game, then you restart th game. when you lose you get new heart.
caxs: retard.
1139hrs BBM personal message
mwen: did you know, earthworm has 5 hearts?
caxs: did you know mwen, i dont even have one?
bbmg Andy Tan.
caxs: eh Thomson damn far eh.
andy: is it not convinient for you?
caxs: if you pick me then convinient la
andy: okay lor. since you wna take advantage of my kindness
caxs: eh i accompany you have lunch eh idiot
andy: oh yah.
1114hrs its been rough. double blow.
i was thinkg of takn off from this life today but Andy managed t make me change my mind so im goin fo lunch later. and ive managed t force him into pickn me, accordg t him “im takin advantage of his kindness”.
2144hrs come, gather and feel sorry for me.
i feel so lonely. let me be open and honest. pitiful and jaded. i feel so fuckin lonely, i jz wna hide under my covers and sleep and forget about this world.
i am ready t die. really am. ive felt happiness at its peak and sadness at its worst. ive loved w all my heart. fought w all my might. hurt with every inch of my bones. ive given and taken all that can be offered. and im done. im ready and...
2128hrs at Chinatown again
after a day of starvation and relying on a can of Redbull and a packet of Dunhills, i met Glen and Nich fo dins and already im at chinatown w Mom tryna pass time cz Brotha and Tams touches down at 1am. I feel like a dead corpse walkin th streets. Fuck this. Fuck everything. And fuck everyone.
Im not th answer so forget you ever thought it was...
Hi anasha. I kno what has been goin on in your life, and my tumblr sure as hell shows exactly what goes on in mine too. We’re pretty much on th same boat,no?
Guy being th love of our lives and still bein th worst person as well, while we watch by th sidelines.
Trust me that I have no intentions of “stealg” sheen or whatsoever cz like you, I have one guy in my heart and i cant...
we cant go on togetha with suspicious minds
Nashess?
oh hi, no i didnt actually bother searching fo your twitter like how i think you did mine, and still denied it. it was actually brought t my attention by another.
you see, your love game isnt my concern because th boy you are going crazy over made th choice himself t rather spend his time w me while lying t you. jz to console you, nothing is goin on, so hold your horses. if anything, i have been...
"Eh babi, ngentot aja lo sm perek lo Cassandra....
woah srsly? your love game is none of my concern. i have enough drama in mine now you, please dont drag me down this traffic you and him seem to be constantly crashing on. and before you play the name calling game, you better think twice of the slut part, cz i clearly wasnt the one who cheated on my boyfriend. eat your heart out.
“If you gave someone your heart and they died, did they take it with them? Did...”
– (via goldigger) (via visualinsanity)
0347hrs how many times can i break till i shatter?
tonight. i feel drained. so much so i barely feel the keypads even as i type. and im blinking my eyes hard to rid the dryness from my lenses. i feel the hollow between my bones, i feel the hollow space of where my heart should be. i am tired of being strong, im tired of being told to be strong, i am tired of trying to be strong. just let me fall weak now, im tired. think maybe its time to delete...
0012hrs and i thought it was gna be an early night
jz got home. seeing..wasnt really a good thing. and i knew how my heart would have stopped like it did. it still is stopping after i say a few words or take a few breaths.
and i thought it’ll be an early night for me because i jz showered and am literally ready fo bed. but thrs people comin over t take me out to nurse my wounds tonight. Thank God. laters then.
“Party til’ you pass out, drink til’ you’re dead. Dance all night til’ you can’t...”
– (via alexnoise)
“‘You do care,’ said Dumbledore. He had not flinched or made a single move to...”
– Harry Potter (via runawaytrain)
seems nothing ever changes, we're back t being...
i wish i didnt wish so hard. maybe i'll wish our...
Maybe people don't leave because things are hard....
(via runawaytrain)
“If you asked me a year ago, I would have told you what you wanted to hear. Now,...”
– (via poeticheartache)
“TWO OF THE HARDEST AND MOST PAINFUL TESTS IN LIFE: HAVING THE PATIENCE TO WAIT...”
– (via desireonrepeat)
Anonymous asked: Cass i just wanted to ask you. Am i fat ? HAHAHAH i'am kidding ! Just wanted to tell you to hang in there. Mayb it won't help telling you this but i'll be praying for you, even if the prayers are really short i'll keep you in them, hoping it will lift up some pain from your heavy heart. kay ? Lotsa love babe, go to school and stop messing around with the young boy boy ahhhh....
There's only so many tears that you can cry....
If I ever break your heart, if I ever do you...
(via runawaytrain)
visualinsanity:
In a way, I need a change From...
